To what extent do states intervene in some humanitarian crises and not others? and what are the success and the failure of humanitarian intervention

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this is the final dissertation proposal and i have already done the initial proposal i will post the teacher comments so that it would help you to write the final one and structure it as he said.

he has three suggestions:
first, it seems to me that there are two concerns in the piece. one involves exploring the causes of humanitarian intervention, the other its consequences. it seems to me that each could form the focus of a dissertation on its own; therefore, as your research progresses, you might find- simply because of the manageability of the task- that you want to confine your attention to just one of the two. second, you want to consider the potential of comparative and case studies. if you were looking at consequences, then you might take two countries, as similar as possible in all relevant respects, one where intervention was successful(and what will be your criteria of success, by the way?, the other where it was successful but not the other and thus to throw light on the conditions governing success in general. if you were looking at causes, then i wonder whether you could focus on a single country and its reactions to different humanitarian crises looking to tease out the empirical evidence that will enable you to explain why it intervened in some crises
but not others. third, you mention a number of potential data collection techniques including the use of focus groups, but i am unclear precisely how these will help you ( specifically, who will be involved and what kinds of information will you seek to gain from them?). in addition, how will you bring the people involved together all in one place? focus groups are incredibly costly and time-consuming, not really feasible. i suggest that if you do interview people, then you will need to use the interview material to support and illustrate points developed on the basis of material gathered elsewhere: it certainly won’t be feasible to use interviewing for any kind of hypothesis testing based on random sampling. you simply wouldn’t be able in the numbers necessary for that.

note that “research methods” covers two aspects 1.research design (or overall research strategy, which i have discussed above); 2. data collection techniques (such as interviewing etc.which you have discussed).

this is the teacher comments from the previous dissertation proposal.
so try and make it clearer and more organised.